Just a disclaimer...
I still worry about the future... I spend many futile nights worried about impending doom... and my life blowing up.
So please don't think for a second that I've solved this problem, BUT... and this is a but that I'm really proud of...
I spend far less time worrying than I once did, and it doesn't paralyse me anymore.
So... What did I do?
Well... the truth is I did a lot of things... the purpose of this blog is to share one simple strategy with you that can help snap you out of the downward spiral of being worried.
Before I share the strategy with you there is one thing I have to cover first...
You spend most of your time worrying about things that have not happened (and never will) and/or feeling shame/guilt for the things that you could/should have done differently.
I know that is pointing out the obvious and it doesn't help you at all... But it's an important place to start.
The purpose of this post isn't shame or guilt so let's just leave that one alone for now...
Ok, so why do you spend your time worrying about the future?
I can't answer that for you, but I can share what I've experienced: the reason I still worry about the future is security.
I want to know that things will be ok, that my family will be safe, that I will have enough money do to what I want.
And I'm starting to realize, slowly and surely, that nothing is guaranteed... and as scary as that can sound for me... It's also been the key point in helping me get through this whole worrying mess.
The other reason that most people worry about the future is that they honestly believe that bad things will happen to them and that the universe is out to get them.
For those people, let me just say, and I mean this in the most loving way possible, the universe doesn't care about you, it's not capable of caring and yes... bad things are going to happen... they happen to everyone.
Now, what can you do?
Live in the present.
I know, I know how cliche... but it's true.
Unfortunately, you are probably not filling up your day with enough stuff to actually keep your mind focused on the present. If your plan for the day involves nothing purposeful... your mind WILL (I guarantee it) wander into the future and you will start to worry.
Action Step #1
At the start of the day while you are drinking your tea/coffee make a list of the things you are going to get done that day. This can be the most trivial list ever... or (and this is what I recommend) this can be a list that is well thought out, purpose-filled, and chock-full of things that will make your future brighter.
Whatever it is, do something. Plan the meals for the week, put on some music and make the family breakfast, clean the house, deal with that closet that you've been putting off for months...
Is this easy? No. In fact taking action, even the smallest thing can be really hard.
However, what it does is it brings your focus to the present and what you are actually doing NOW.
This is also the positive (non-mystical) benefit of meditation... It brings your mind into focus on what is actually happening right now.
Your goal is to spend your day living in the actual world around you.
But... and I hope you're asking this:
"What about my future? How will I know where I am going if I don't plan for it and just spend my time in the present?"
That brings us to...
Action Step #2
Have specific times (morning, once a month, every 90 days) where you plan for your future and strategize.
As a human, you control your life. Therefore, you need time to plan the course of it.
And once you have things planned and you know the specifics of what needs to get done then put the planning away and don't think about it until it's time to review how you are doing.
The rest of the time is spent DOING (in the moment) the tasks and things that help you be present.
Got it? Simple right?
I wish.
Your brain is a muscle, and like other muscles you have to train it to be strong.
Just start... I promise you will love who you become.
What about you? What have you done to stop yourself from worrying about the future? Please a comment below and let me know.